Because God’s children are human beings—made of flesh and blood—the Son also became flesh and blood. For only as a human being could he die, and only by dying could he break the power of the devil, who had the power of death. Only in this way could he set free all who have lived their lives as slaves to the fear of dying. Hebrews 2:14-15 (NLT)
I have some weird health issues. Every now and then, this one thing will happen and when it does, it is super unnerving. It’s scary to me and to anyone who notices it. It happened again recently, while I was preaching. By the grace of God, I finished the sermon and most people (except for those closest to me), didn’t know.
But I did and let’s just say my first thought was that I wasn’t going to preach ever again. Even though God finished the sermon, I became super afraid that this would happen again and what if it didn’t go so well the next time? What if?
Those what-if questions pop into your head a lot when there is something in your life you can’t control. And as I ponder those questions, they get worse and the fear grows more intense. So, I pray. Because hey, the only person who can control it is God.
During my prayers, I think of Paul who had a thorn in the flesh. I keep praying because that didn’t make me feel any better. (just being honest.) Everyone keeps saying I should slow down, I should rest. So what? I sit on a couch my whole life and do what? I believe God has a call on my life (by the way, I believe God has a call on all of our lives). If that is so, I am pretty sure it isn’t to sit on the couch and rest. And, that is not how God wired me.
But, I don’t want to be afraid either. I don’t want to not step into my calling because of fear. That would be a tragedy. So I prayed some more. And God brought today’s text into my worship. Jesus died so I would not live my life as a slave to the fear of dying. And I’d like to take it a step further. Jesus died so I would not have to live my life as a slave to fear. Period. He broke the power of death. He broke the power of fear. He broke Satan. WOOT!
This verse spurred a talk with God about what it was I was actually afraid of. And as I discussed these things with him, this verse popped into my head.
“My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” 2 Corinthians 12:9
I guess I have two choices. One, walk around being afraid and have that limit what I do or two, lean into the power of Jesus Christ. The rest of that verse says:
So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses so that the power of Christ can work through me.
I’ll still be praying because it is still scary sometimes but I will also turn it over to Jesus. I will boast about my weakness so Jesus can shine through. He loves me so much he died so I could live being sure of who holds my life and my future.